Do you struggle with self-esteem and self-confidence?

August 31, 2020

Believe in yourself. 


I am a woman in my mid-50s, who by all outwardly appearances am confident and accomplished. However, throughout my life I have struggled with my self-esteem and confidence. As an introvert, I naturally want to be an observer. When I begin to doubt myself, I become even more hesitant to participate and engage in social settings. The struggle for confidence and self-esteem can be rooted in various challenges from childhood and from adulthood. As a psychotherapist, I see many individuals who come to therapy with the goal of improving their confidence and self-esteem. In other words, there are many of us who have different internal feelings and beliefs that impact our identity and how we interact in the world.


Self-esteem is the personal understanding that one is worthy and that you can hold yourself in positive regard.  It is the confidence in one’s own worth and self-respect for who you are. Healthy Self-esteem is positively holding one’s values and having a favorable attitude towards oneself (Morris Rosenberg, 1965).


Self-confidence is the outward expression of one’s positive belief about oneself. It is the capacity to function with belief that one’s actions will have an acceptable outcome. Self-confidence is the trust in one’s abilities, beliefs, and values.


There are many different influences on one’s self-esteem and self-confidence. These include, and are not limited to:

  • Age

  • Childhood and life experiences

  • Genetics

  • Personality

  • Health

  • Thoughts and Beliefs

  • Social circumstances

  • The reactions of others

  • Trauma

  • Comparing the self to others

  • Environmental beliefs and systems



There are several ways to improve self-esteem and self-confidence. Experiences in life and a strong personal identity can be important factors in one’s self-esteem and self-confidence. Working with a therapist can help you identify the challenges that you may struggle with that influence your self-esteem and self-confidence. However you decide to tackle this, if you do, you will gain a greater sense of freedom and satisfaction that can help you have a more fulfilling and flourishing life.


If you would like to know more speak to me to book an appointment. Deborah Kopeschny, Blooming Life,; 416-312-1636.


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